Let’s Make Integrity Hot Again, Shall We?
Oh hi, it’s me, just here having a fun ‘ole Covid week. First it hit the hub, then the son-in-law, then my daughter. I’m the last adult standing, and all kids are so far virus-free. (We think—the seven-year-old pitched such a fit his mother could barely do the test. It came back negative, but an uncertain negative.) Pro tip: Paxlovid is a miracle drug, just saying.
So, yeah, when I haven’t been care-taking people back to health (hahaha, just kidding, I’m the worst nurse ever) I’ve been thinking about integrity, as one does. I think it’s time to make integrity sexy again, as opposed to one of those words that makes your energy drop immediately, like discipline or productivity. Integrity is cool, because it is all about being in line with yourself (and others, but that comes much more easily when you’re copacetic with yourself). Its root word is the Latin adjective integer, meaning whole or complete. I don’t know about you but the times I feel most whole and complete are, A. when I’m writing, or B. right after I’ve written.
That’s one way I like to think about integrity. But another is that I’m being true to myself, trusting myself. And by trusting myself I mean I can trust myself to do the things I say I’m going to do—like write. This is one of the things I’ve been working on all year with my coach, Camille Pagán. It means that I figure out a schedule and then follow it. I am the queen of rebelling when I make schedules, which is stupid because it is me that I am rebelling against.
There’s also the thing that acting in integrity is key to a couple of different things you want to coddle as a writer. Thing #1—it helps you take risks. More on that in a minute. Thing #2—it helps you vanquish self-doubt. Maybe not completely, because is there an artist on the planet who does not struggle with self-doubt once in a while? I think not. But it can go a long way towards conquering it, because self-trust trumps self-doubt.
And now for Thing #2, that bit about risk. Safe and free are my two words for 2023 (having only one word is so passé.) Safe and free in 2023. Nice ring to it, right? But here’s the funny thing—when I delve into what makes me feel safe and free, there’s actually an element of taking risks to it, of feeling grounded enough in who I am and where I’m at to do that. And taking risks, to me, is part of integrity. I’m not taking about climbing a mountain or going parasailing (did that once, never again), or rowing across the ocean. Oh hell no. I’m talking about garden variety writing risks. This year, for example, I took the risk to publish two books after years of dithering and hoping that the Good Publishing Fairy would anoint me with her magic wand. That kind of risk taking is integral to what I want to accomplish in life, which is to be a career author with many books for you to enjoy. And so when I take such a risk, I’m acting in integrity.
You might feel you’re taking a risk every time you’re sitting down to the page. Maybe you’re writing a memoir that you’re afraid will hurt people. Or maybe taking a risk for you is joining a critique group, sending your work to beta readers, or hiring a book coach. But those are risks that are integral to accomplishing your goals and so you will be out of integrity if you don’t do them.
So there, I’ve managed to link integrity to risk taking and I think that counts as hella sexy, don’t you? We’ve got two more weeks of 2022 left, so why not approach them with integrity?
Note: This post is excerpted from my weekly newsletter, The Abundant Writer. If you’d like to receive these missives straight to your inbox, you can subscribe here. Thanks, and happy writing!